Anger and Meditation

So a little over two weeks ago I had surgery on my knee. Nothing serious, just arthroscopic surgery to drain fluid and remove cartilage (or so I am told). Yeah, I really do not know since the surgeon never sent the report to my doctor, and I refuse to go back to the surgeon after the experience I had (details here).

I do not ask for a lot, at least of my friends (my husband is a different story), but after I had surgery I needed FRIENDS! You know, someone to come by, give me some company, see how I am doing, whatever... but sadly NO ONE came by. Not even my next door neighbor till like more than a week later. So I am sitting here wondering "Am I that much of a raging bitch that no one wants to see me?", another thought was "Are all of these people really not friends and just selfish pricks who talk to me and do things with me when it is convenient for them?" I choose the latter... selfish pricks.

This brings me to now where I started deleting people from my Facebook for reasons such as "I hate you, just looking at your face makes me want to smash my computer into tiny bits!!!", and "You are all bitches!!! I never liked you, you never liked me, so why are you adding me????" Yeah I am a bit moody, but I am just TIRED of fake people. I have no room for users in my life, no room for fakes... I need reality!!!

I spend my time either on my Facebook, Pogo.com, or AMAZON!!!!!! where I spend way more money than I ever need (or want) to. I also spend my days attempting to get my bachelors degree in social work... so, yeah through all the drama and bullshit I need a venting place. And this is it. If you have issue with foul language... go somewhere else (see how I nicely refrained from saying "fuck off"?), I use it daily and it is worse when I am angry!

Welcome to my insanity!